Mind Your Own God Damn Business

I’ve owned my desktop computer for about six years now. It still basically works, which is constantly amazing to me. Ten years ago, you could expect about two years of usefulness from a computer before you could barely even use it for word processing. Mine has its problems – I should probably buy some more RAM for it now that a GB of DDR2 RAM costs about as much as a box of condoms (And I think we all know which one I will use more), and I probably need a new graphics card if I want to play higher end games. Other than that, this thing is still chugging along nicely.

The downside to this is that it has gotten incredibly dirty over the years.

I think I’m fighting a mild bout of depression right now, and part of that is doing weird, stupid shit that I don’t normally do in order to avoid doing the things I should be doing. Case in point: I spent about an hour cleaning my keyboard today. This is the first time I’ve cleaned this keyboard in the six years that I’ve owned it, and it was terrifying. I went through a lot of rubbing alcohol and cotton balls, and every time that I was finished with one, it looked like I had wiped my ass with it. I also apparently shed an alarming amount while I’m using the computer – I could knit a sweater with all of the hair that I cleaned out of the keyboard.

I swear that I’m not, but if you looked at everything that I pulled out of and cleaned off of my keyboard, you would probably think that I operate it with my butt. Same story with the mouse.

Good for handcramps, frustration and merciless beatings.

I also broke down and threw away about 25 pounds of electronics equipment that I’ve been amassing over the past 15 years – phone cords, SCSI cable, Zip Disks, two broken walkmans from high school, a 2400 baud modem, the uncomfortable, shitty mouse that came with the first iMacs, plugs to gadgets that I don’t own anymore – It’s amazing how hard it was for me to part with all of it, seeing as none of it will be even a little bit useful to me unless I wake up tomorrow and it’s 1997. Even if that does happen, half of the stuff I tossed doesn’t work anymore – I essentially just refuse to throw away any of my trash if you can put batteries in it or plug it into a wall.

Lastly, I got my hands on a copy of Incredibad by Lonely Planet, and it’s actually pretty good. About half of the songs I had already heard on Saturday Night Live digital shorts, which were kind of nice to actually have. Lazy Sunday is funny, but half of what I liked about it was how god damned catchy it was. Most of the CD is like that. I find myself chuckling, but an hour later, I find myself humming the songs.

Here’s an example. It will more than likely be pulled down in an hour or two, or maybe I’m just saying that because I put a broken link up in the first place. I guess that you’ll never know.

You see what I mean? You’ll be humming that shit all day.

Alright. I need to go find something else stupid to do so I don’t accidentally accomplish something today. Maybe I’ll pluck my eyebrows.

Later.